10 things I learned from my son’s homework

My son has had a major assignment to complete for school. It was handed our in late February and is due on Tuesday. It feels a bit like we have never known life without “the project”.

It’s not that I did his homework for him (because quite frankly it’s too hard and I couldn’t) but I did supervise him throughout the very arduous process. And I guess that’s a good thing because there was a lot that I learned over this time

1. I am too old for homework.
2. Homework for year 6’s is very hard in 2013 – we’re talking questions that test skills like “provocative questioning” and “tolerance for ambiguity”.  When I was in year 6 they were testing my ability to answer questions in full sentences.
3. I know nothing about Australian history and next to nothing about World War 1  (okay not next to nothing – properly nothing)

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4. The school that my son attends does not know what they want in a bibliography. They do have a booklet in which they offer two completely conflicting ways to do the bibliography. They then refer you to their online student portal to check that you have done it correctly. Problem is that there is no bibliography on the online portal. It is clear that they don’t know what they want. Hopefully they like the way I did it in Year 6 back in the 80’s because that’s the way I taught Little Pencil to do it. Pity there were no such thing as a website when I was in Year 6. There was also no such things as online portals
5. I have no patience
6. If you ask your child to go the extra mile and put in a little more effort you will regret it when he insists on making a board game to show what he has learned in a “engaged, relevant and exciting way”
7. Playing said board game will make you want to change his entire project and hand it in under the name “Bored Game”
8. Boys are very different from girls when it comes to completing projects. You cannot entice a boy (well at least not my boy) with pretty paraphernalia and as hard as it is to resign yourself to the fact that it his project and must look the way he wants it to look, you have to. When he starts choosing fonts on his own all your ideas of a classy looking project will be thrown out the door
9. If you buy your child plastic toy soldiers as pieces for his board game you will realise that no matter that he is 12 and has not so much as looked at a toy for about a year, he will play for hours setting up the “guys” and imitating both the wars that he has read about and the seriously scary wars that he has in his imagination.
10. I am thrilled I am no longer at school. Thrilled.

But in honesty I am really proud of his project – especially the very boring amazing game he made – I can’t wait till he takes it to school so that I don’t have to play it again.