In the 1970’s this man followed you home, now he’s talking to your child online

Every parent’s biggest fear; a child being approached by a stranger online. The stranger’s not just chatting to the child, he’s actively (and surreptitiously) corrupting him). And this time it’s not just an urban legend that a friend of a friend of a friend heard about her friend’s friend’s child.

NSW Police report

Police from the Sex Crimes Squad’s Child Exploitation Internet Unit have arrested and charged a 48-year-old Neutral Bay man for soliciting child abuse material from a 14-year-old boy in the United States.

Detectives will contend that during December 2013, the man, using the assumed online identity of a teenage girl, engaged a 14-year-old New York boy in online conversation via a social networking site. During these conversations, the man allegedly encouraged the boy to perform sexual acts into a webcam. Shortly afterwards, the man posted a recording of the boy onto a video sharing website.
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Learning to walk away from violence

jaiLittle Pencil started tae kwondo when he was four years old. I encouraged him to start because it was very convenient. What mother wouldn’t love a sport that took place in a shopping centre? He wanted to start because he was a boy and he had plenty of energy and a huge desire to kick and punch.

Even though my decision to start him training in martial arts may have been based on convenience, there were a few other factors at play. He was really small and I thought that knowing a few moves may give him some confidence, I had also heard that martial arts was good for focus and discipline and who wouldn’t benefit from that?

What I didn’t know is just how much he would get out of it, not just physically but emotionally, socially and intellectually.

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This Christmas I am making a wish. I want you to join me

I woke up feeling very sorry for myself this morning. My litany of complaints was long.

• My son was going on camp today and as much as he was excited, the control freak in me was hugely out of sorts with the idea of having no contact with him for five days.
• It is ridiculously hot
• I have been having the most terrible nightmares and therefore not getting nearly enough sleep
• On a scale of one to ten of cranky I was an 11
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The week that was

Welcome to my week, well at least a reflection on it

Bad

“What counts in life is not the mere fact that we have lived. It is what difference we have made to the lives of others that will determine the significance of the life we lead.” – Nelson Mandela

It’s hard to explain how much Nelson Mandela meant to me as a South African. A bastion of strength, freedom, courage and honour. A man who was like God in stature yet felt like part of your own family in his humility and grace. I remember the time my sister met him and shook his hand, she almost refused to wash her hand ever again. I was glad to be with her this morning when I heard of his passing.  I imagine that many people feel the connection I do today. Hamba Kahle Madiba, rest forever in peace.   And I hope with every fibre of my being that South Africa can keep it together.
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And their lives will never be the same again

I was going to write a post about something light and airy, superfluous and funny today. But then I went shopping and my day changed. And my mood. And a whole lot of people’s lives.

I was in Bondi Junction going to pick up some new glasses because people have started printing things really small these days. I parked my car and went through the entrance I always use – near the sushi place and the fruit shop, that way I know I will always find my car again.
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The state is not a good parent

foster careI once heard a woman from the Department of Community Services say that she had never met a mother that didn’t love her child.

I’ve read more than enough stories of the most terrible and awful child abuse and neglect meted out to innocent children and there is not a cell in my body that wants to defend anything close to abuse. It doesn’t sound like love to me. But I haven’t been out there, I haven’t seen the mothers whose intellectual impairments, emotional emptiness, physical circumstances, drug addictions and alcohol slavery speaks louder than any maternal instinct.

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How was your week?

Last week I ranted wrote about my week, both the good parts and the bad parts, and I have to say it was quite cathartic so I’m thinking I should do it again – and you can rant (or rave) with me and then I won’t feel like every second word I say is “I”.  I need more “we” in my life.

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Who is buying all these magazines?

I think it’s fair to say that I am a fairly gullible person when it comes to marketing. After all, I have bought all the mascara in the world and I still don’t have eyelashes like they promise, I have tried almost every concealer and you can still see that I have blemishes and I have bought at least three different kinds of egg poachers and I still can’t make restaurant quality eggs.

I also tend to take in most things I see in print, believing (erroneously) that if it’s been commissioned by an editor, produced by a journalist, looked over by a sub-editor and gone through legals etc it should have a grain or more of truth.
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The bad good week

Inspired by a rant from Woog (which you can read here) I need to get a few things off my chest (both good and bad) . I need to do it so urgently I don’t even have time for an introduction. So here goes:

The BAD

Hunting

Seriously! WTF is it with people who hunt lions for sport? Melissa Bachman is an American television presenter who posted an image on Facebook and Twitter of herh olding a rifle and smiling beside the corpse of the most magnificent male lion. ”Incredible day in South Africa, Stalked inside 60 yards on this beautiful male lion – what a hunt!” she said.
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The most diabolical situation for a mother and a newborn you could imagine

I don’t often write about politics. I don’t know enough about it to commentate or try and inform anyone else’s opinion. And today is no different – I’m not writing this post about politics, I am writing this post about being human. About having a conscience and treating other people with respect, with compassion.

Today Fairfax reports

An asylum seeker who was moved off Nauru to give birth is being locked up for 18 hours a day in a detention centre in Brisbane while her week-old baby remains in hospital.

The case of Latifa, a 31-year-old woman of the persecuted Rohingya people of Myanmar, has shocked churches and refugee advocates. She was separated from her baby on Sunday, four days after a caesarean delivery, and has since been allowed to visit him only between 10am and 4pm in Brisbane’s Mater Hospital.

The boy, named Farus, has respiratory problems and needs constant medical care.

Latifa is confined to the Brisbane Immigration Transit Accommodation, 20 minutes away, where her husband and two children, four and seven, are being held.

Latifa’s husband, Niza, is not allowed to visit the child at all, according to people in daily contact with the family.

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Latifa has spent nearly 10 years in a refugee camp in Malaysia, she was transferred from Nauru to give birth to her baby. I heard her speak, through an interpreter, about the terrible conditions she was experiencing there. About the heat, about her children being fed food that was uncooked and could make them very ill. The awful conditions of a life that she never chose.

Latifa is a mother. A woman trying to find a place for her family to live. I was born privileged, I have never had to run for my life. I have never had to worry about whether my child would die from heat, malaria or eating raw food.

But like Latifa my son was in the neo-natal intensive care unit. Unlike Latifa I sat by his side day in and day out. I left his crib to sleep at around midnight but snuck back in at around 5am because being without him felt like my heart was being torn out of my body. He was my baby and he was sick and I needed to be with him. His father spent every minute he could with him, he spoke to him, sang to him, read to him through the perspex sides of the humidcrib. He had spoken to my pregnant stomach for seven months and our tiny little baby responded to his father’s voice. It was not just the amazing nursing staff, brilliant doctors and 24 hour care that nursed my son back to health – it was the love he received from his parents at his bedside.

I am appalled by Scott Morrison’s decision. I am frightened about people in power having no compassion and no heart. I feel sick for the thousands of people who don’t have the right to safety, the right to asylum, the right to be with their children.  I feel ashamed by our government’s stance on asylum seekers.

Please join me in signing this petition here or this one here and writing to Scott Morrisson at scott.morrison.mp@aph.gov.au . The standard we walk past is the standard we accept.