My anxiety is a tricky beast. It’s aware I would never invite it in so it just appears and then stabs me repeatedly in the chest area to remind me of its existence.
My anxiety beast loves change almost as much as I hate it. Whenever there is a slight whiff of change in the air he swoops in and attaches himself to me like an iron filing to a magnet. Or a parasite to my flesh.
It’s that capacity to sense and swoop in on change that makes sure my anxiety knocks out any excitement I may have before it has a chance to express itself. Picture my head as a 3 litre container – anxiety is 4 litres and takes up all the space spilling over and not allowing the other emotions any light or space. It’s odd how I can see that objectively but I can’t stop it from happening. [Read more…]